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Category Archives: Charitable Works
I knew when Tashia contacted me about wanting Mount Washington KY Newborn Photography performed for her foster son that her family was going to be special to me. She explained that she and her husband were fostering to adopt and were looking for a photographer to capture the time they had with their baby. She had be referred to me by someone in their church and was hoping to get in quickly since their baby was already a week old. We discussed standard packages and sitting fees, but something about her story spoke to me and wanted to do something special for their family. Anytime I feel that tug at my heart, I know it is God telling me I need to give back with the talents He has given me, so I offered do donate their session fees and half of their product collection as my contribution toward their adoption story. I didn’t want them to pass up the opportunity to document this chapter in their lives with little Jeremiah over something so trivial as money.
Tashia and Patrick have been such a blessing to work with during Jeremian’s newborn session. You could tell how happy they were to finally have a baby in their arms and calling him their own. Patrick even had his own baby pictures out and showing them to me and remarking about how much Jeremiah looked like him even though they may not have been blood related; the resemblance was uncanny. Jeremiah had definitely stolen their hearts the moment this beautiful couple had laid eyes on him and you could see how smitten these two were with him (and each other). 🙂
Now that Jeremiah’s adoption has gone through, the family has decided to share their story with us to help other locals in the community with words of wisdom about the fostering to adoption process.
Read below in Tashia’s words:
“We reached a stage in our life where we knew we wanted a family. We knew that our love for children and for one another was strong enough to provide a safe and loving home to a child that may not have grew in our tummy, but grew in our hearts. We had prayed that a child would be placed in our home rather it was physically or through adoption. And God answered our prayers through the journey of adoption. There were a few things that happened during the process that confirmed adoption would be part of our life story.”
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“As we embarked on this journey, we knew that all of the paperwork, credit checks and wait time were going to be challenging, but it was all going to be worth it when we saw our little one’s precious face.
As with every adoption or foster situation, the risk of the child going back is there. That is why it’s so important to set your mind going into it, that everything will work out the way God has it planned. And with that it gave us peace in knowing God would allow things to fall into place and in the end we would have a precious child to love, teach, encourage and guide. All we knew when we first met them was to be ourselves and love them as we would love any of our family or friends. In the end, being a true christian example to them both was our priority.”
“Our birth mom was an amazing, strong, beautiful and selfless young woman who wanted to give her baby a life. When we walked in and saw him for the first time my eyes filled with tears. Happy tears that is. As I looked in her eyes as she presented him to us I felt a love that I had never experienced before, a love God had for all of us when he forgave us of our sins and gave us a second chance. All I thought was how much love it takes of a women that carried a child for 9 months to just hand them to someone she barely knew. That is where God’s plan comes in. Only God can create a situation like this to help a birth mom pick the perfect family that will confirm they will be loved and cared for. Our experience to love no matter the outcome was one that made us all stronger . People say that he is so lucky to have been adopted by us, but that’s far from the truth. He’s birth mom helped fill a missing piece in our hearts and lives we desired which was to have a child and a family. We are so blessed that she chose us to love and raise Jeremiah and helped us full-fill our family dream. While God knew the perfect child, and time it would take for them to arrive, seeing him and experiencing the birth-mothers love was proof God netted this perfect little boy just for us because he is was the spitting image of Patrick and I and that left us speechless. Our adoption journey had its ups and downs but waking up every morning to his smiles is priceless!! I am thankful for his birth mom and her strength every day and love and life she gave him!
It was amazing bringing him home for the first time. The love we have for little Jeremiah is one that is explainable, but one that we will protect forever. The sleepless nights, snuggles and smiles are totally worth it!
When the road gets challenging or frustrating know that your story is being made and the perfect child will be placed in your life at the perfect time. When we saw that our little one looked just like Patrick and I we knew that everyone has their perfect little one and the wait is all worth it when you see their little face!”
If you’re interested in more info on Mount Washington KY Newborn Photography, you can book online or email Hello@jlritt.com. I look forward to working with you!
More about the photographer:
Jennifer Rittenberry Photography is an award winning photographer based out of Mount Washington Kentucky. She has been photographing clients throughout the greater Louisville area since 2010 and acquired a brick and mortar studio space in the heart of downtown Mount Washington in May 2017. Jennifer is passionate about her work and strives to achieve the highest level of excellence in her photography, which has earned her a Click PRO status with Clickin Moms Magazine and elite membership with NAPCP. She is also a published artist with NAPCP (National Association of Professional Child Photographers) for her 2017 Rainbow Baby Maternity Series, TAoPAN Magazine in the 2017 Multiples Issue for her newborn twins artistry, Beauty & Lifestyle Mommy Magazine and Newborn Photographer Magazine, as well as named 2016 Parent’s Choice Award winner for her fine art portraiture. Located in Central Kentucky, her new studio is only 6 minutes from the Gene Snyder Freeway off the Bardstown exit, and only 6 minutes outside of Louisville. Jennifer Rittenberry Photography session fees can be found on the website but detailed pricing and availability may be requested by email using the contact form.
You are welcome to connect with Jennifer Rittenberry Photography by following her work on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. SIGN UP FOR OUR NEWSLETTER so you can be the first to know about any upcoming portrait specials, mini session events, and other news!
We are located at 1200 North Bardstown Road – Suite 1-A, Mount Washington, KY 40047. Get in touch at (502) 523-2180!
Usually I start off my posts saying how excited I was to meet a new client or to be able to connect with them on a personal level. Today, not so much. This post is about an amazing woman that has endured more pain than should be humanly possible and yet she still smiles when she greets you like she hasn’t a care in the world.
Immediately after receiving the very first email from Megan, I knew I HAD to do something for her. She had explained to me that she was pregnant and was looking for a Rainbow Baby Girl Newborn Photography Session, but wasn’t sure that her husband would still be around for the birth due to some health issues. She was most interested in making sure she had a family portrait with her children and their father as she wasn’t sure if his time with them would be limited. I invited her to my studio to show her around and get more of her story so I could really connect with her. She brought me to tears as she relayed all of the details of her life the past few years and still makes me catch my breath every time I think of how lucky this family is to have “daddy” around to make new memories with. These are memories that deserve to be preserved, but she had contacted me a few days later to let me know that it just wasn’t feasible for them to be able to afford having their photos done professionally. Upon reading her email, I knew I needed to step up and MAKE IT HAPPEN for them. I donated all of the images that you see here as my prayerful blessing to their family and an opportunity to share with you their story. A story of love and hope. Every day is a blessing. Hug those that you love with all of your might and if you’re holding out on telling someone how you feel, there’s no better time than the present. We never know when our time is up.
Megan’s Story in her own words:
“Ben and Megan have been married for six and a half years, and in that time, they’ve experienced wonderful joys and heartbreaking trials. Together they have ushered in the remission of Ben’s cancer, pushed through two lung collapses, welcomed their son Beckett into the world and said goodbye to two babies too early. Their first pregnancy ending in a miscarriage and their third pregnancy the loss of their son Connelly Harding, who was born sleeping on February 15th, 2016.
In October of 2016 Megan, Ben and Beckett would welcome another child into their lives, due September 5th, 2017. The road to that date would not be an easy one, wrought with complications of it’s own and the unthinkable — Ben would suffer complete cardiac arrest on March 20th. While at work on the 20th, Ben would collapse, his heart stopped. A nearby co-worker would find him and call for assistance, another would begin CPR, the AED utilized. As the ambulance rushed Ben to the hospital, they would call his time of death once. But, further work by staff would start his heart again. He was placed in a medical coma, and a hypothermic bed. Tuesday morning the doctors would inform Megan — now in her second trimester, that she needed to prepare herself to be a widow on Wednesday morning when they began removing the sedation. The best-case scenario from the doctor was to prepare that Ben would live, but with so much brain damage, she would never bring him home again. Megan called for friends and family to write messages to Ben, and she hung them on his window.
She sat and watched the sunrise over those prayers, well wishes, and funny memories while pouring through her Bible study. Wednesday came, and by the grace of God, Ben woke up. Ben woke up telling jokes, confused about what had happened, but alive and with perfect brain function. Nurses and doctors alike would stop in the room for the next few days, oftentimes in tears, amazed that he was alive. But the journey wouldn’t end there — ultrasounds of their new baby showed that she wasn’t growing properly, and then that her placenta wasn’t working. Frequent appointments and scans became routine, and up until 36 weeks, there always seemed to be another scare. At 38 weeks, the doctor would share with them that the baby’s placenta would stop supporting her life, most likely, before Megan would go into labor. Therefore an induction that ultimately would fail was scheduled for August 30, and Adelaide Rose would be born via C-section on August 31, 2017. A miracle baby born to the miracle of a man.”
Adelaide Rose Stofer
We went for the rainbow theme for some of her styling, but it was really important to the family to get alot of images together. They also brought in Adelaide’s heavenly siblings lovie that he had with him at the hospital. Sentimental items such as this are so special to incoporate into a session and I always encourage clients to let me know if they have these types of items to make sure we use them in their session. Nothing makes a session more personally styled and unique as adding in an heirloom such as that.
I want to thank Megan for being strong and being a warrior for her family. I really value this family and their willingness to share their story.
If you’re looking for a Rainbow Baby Photographer in the Louisville Metro area or are interested in booking a newborn session, you can book online HERE or email Hello@jlritt.com. I look forward to working with you!
More about the photographer:
Jennifer Rittenberry Photography is an award winning photographer based out of Mount Washington Kentucky. She has been photographing clients throughout the greater Louisville area since 2010 and acquired a brick and mortar studio space in the heart of downtown Mount Washington in May 2017. Jennifer is passionate about her work and strives to achieve the highest level of excellence in her photography, which has earned her a Click PRO status with Clickin Moms Magazine and elite membership with NAPCP. She is also a published artist with NAPCP (National Association of Professional Child Photographers) for her 2017 Rainbow Baby Maternity Series, TAoPAN Magazine in the 2017 Multiples Issue for her newborn twins artistry, Beauty & Lifestyle Mommy Magazine and Newborn Photographer Magazine, as well as named 2016 Parent’s Choice Award winner for her fine art portraiture. Located in Central Kentucky, her new studio is only 6 minutes from the Gene Snyder Freeway off the Bardstown exit, and only 6 minutes outside of Louisville. Jennifer Rittenberry Photography session fees can be found on the website but detailed pricing and availability may be requested by email using the contact form.
You are welcome to connect with Jennifer Rittenberry Photography by following her work on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. SIGN UP FOR OUR NEWSLETTER so you can be the first to know about any upcoming portrait specials, mini session events, and other news!
We have MOVED! As of May 1, 2017 we are now located at 1200 North Bardstown Road – Suite 1-A, Mount Washington, KY 40047. Get in touch at (502) 523-2180!
In June, I had the honor of photographing Baby Jayce as his Mount Washington KY Rainbow Baby Photographer. You may recall from previous posts that his mommy won a newborn session with my studio during the Rainbow Baby Maternity Event that I hosted in the early Spring of this year. Sheena, Jayce’s mom, was able to carry him full term and had no complications during his delivery. We are all so happy that he was born healthy and without any causes for alarm.
His newborn session was based on the Rainbow Baby theme in addition to including forest creatures. His nursery has a woodsy outdoor theme, so the forest animals went well with his decor. Jayce slept so great during his session and we were able to fly through several setups pretty quickly. Here’s a handful of my absolute favorites from his session.
If you’re looking for a Mount Washington KY Rainbow Baby Photographer, please connect with us through the contact tab or shoot an email to Hello@jlritt.com. You can also book your newborn session online.
More about the photographer:
Jennifer Rittenberry Photography is an award winning photographer based out of Mount Washington Kentucky. She has been photographing clients throughout the greater Louisville area since 2010 and acquired a brick and mortar studio space in the heart of downtown Mount Washington in May 2017. Jennifer is passionate about her work and strives to achieve the highest level of excellence in her photography, which has earned her a Click PRO status with Clickin Moms Magazine and elite membership with NAPCP. She is also a published artist in Beauty & Lifestyle Mommy Magazine and Newborn Photographer Magazine, as well as named 2016 Parent’s Choice Award winner for her fine art portraiture. In 2013, she focused her client base to Newborn and Maternity as she created a niche for herself after mentoring with three of the nation’s leading photographers in these industries. She has spent countless hours on continuing her education and sharpening her skills each year with the sole purpose of creating beautiful artwork for her clients to share with their families and preserve as precious heirlooms for generations to come. Located in Central Kentucky, her new studio is only 6 minutes from the Gene Snyder Freeway off the Bardstown exit, and only 6 minutes outside of Louisville. Jennifer Rittenberry Photography session fees can be found on the website but detailed pricing and availability may be requested by email using the contact form.
You are welcome to connect with Jennifer Rittenberry Photography by following my work on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. SIGN UP FOR OUR NEWSLETTER so you can be the first to know about any upcoming portrait specials, mini session events, and other news!
We have MOVED! As of May 1, 2017 we are now located at 1200 North Bardstown Road – Suite 1-A, Mount Washington, KY 40047. Get in touch at (502) 523-2180!
In April I blogged about a local community outreach project that I worked on called the Rainbow Baby Maternity Event. This event featured seven local mothers that had lost a baby through miscarriage, stillbirth or death in infancy and were carrying their “Rainbow Baby”. A Rainbow Baby is ‘The rainbow at the end of the storm, the light in your life’. The storm being the miscarriage/still birth/infant death & the rainbow being the baby they have successfully carried to term without problems/complications. I blogged each mother’s story individually to highlight their beauty and perseverance despite such heartache. The purpose of this series is to shine a light on this sensitive subject, and hopefully help other mothers going through the same loss to be able to open up about their experience and begin the healing process.
I worked closely with several vendors to help make this event extra special for each mommy. I brought in The Wave Salon & Spa to do hair and makeup to try and make the moms feel pampered. They had 3 of their artists come in on their day off to donate their services for this cause, with one even being the owner of the salon. I reached out to several vendors to request donations for the event to try and personalize their swag bags and make them feel like they were not just another story in a sea of tragedies. Heart and Arrow Boutique donated customized newborn onsies with each mother’s due date and rainbow baby graphic, KNOTSLLC donated newborn beanies with cloud graphic with RAINBOW hand-stitched on it, Dock-A-Tot donated a deluxe safari dock to raffle! Also included in the swag bags were Gift Certificates to Maggie Mae’s Cafe, a homemade sugar scrub made by Jennifer Norton of Semonin Realtors, a hand etched wine glass by Specially Yours, a dozen fingerprint cookies in rainbow colors from Sweet Stuff Bakery, and discount codes to Basic Invite and Made by Mary. They also received a $100 discount for a newborn session and 20% off of a custom album from my studio! As if that wasn’t enough, they also received a FREE 20″ x 30″ x 1.5″ thick canvas of their favorite images from the day’s shoot from Canvas HQ!
I think all of the mommies-to-be looked absolutely stunning! A special thank you to Light Box Louisville for donating your studio space to shoot this series in1
Lastly, we drew for a FREE Newborn Session with my studio, Jennifer Rittenberry Photography! Sheena Ford won this grand prize and we just photographed her sweet little baby boy, Jayce, on July 6, 2017! I’ll be posting his session images to the blog soon, but here’s a sneak peek!
You can read each mother’s story by clicking on the hyper-linked names, but here are their comments about how this special day has affected their lives. When I first read each one, I can’t tell you the overwhelming joy it gave me to see that I actually helped someone throughout this process. I am so humbled to have been able to play such a small role in making their tragic journeys a little brighter.
Heather Cronin:
This experience was definitely a once in a lifetime type that I will always cherish and remember! Being 39 weeks pregnant, I was at the point in my pregnancy where I certainly wasn’t feeling very pretty, but thanks to Jennifer I got to feel beautiful, and have pictures of myself feeling the most beautiful I had in a long time! After losing two pregnancies this baby was extra special to my husband and I, and it was so wonderful to get to document it both with pictures and with telling my story. My losses weren’t something I had ever hidden, but also wasn’t something I openly talked about that often, so getting to share this with friends and family was very freeing. I also LOVED getting to meet Jennifer, the other six girls and getting to share all our stories; I feel like we all genuinely care for each other and will rejoice in the births of each of our babies!!
Amanda Page:
What Jennifer did was amazing not only for the mommas who got to be apart of the event but also for family’s all over who are suffering with the loss of baby. This event Jennifer did brought 7 women with completely different backgrounds and stories of how they are currently carrying their rainbow baby. Each story from each mom shows the world that infant loss and rainbow babies happen in many different ways and to so many different people.
This event not only allowed me to be pampered for the day, receive amazing photos of my rainbow baby bump, and bring awareness to a topic that no one speaks about, it did so much more. It allowed me to realize I am not alone and I don’t have to suffer my miscarriage in silence. People might not always know what to say but they care and other people who have experienced infant loss know the pain and suffering you are struggling with. So from this event I was able to realize it’s okay to talk about what happened and it’s okay to be celebrating my rainbow baby!
When Jennifer posted my story and photos on social media from this event, the reactions I received were amazing and beyond what I expected. They brought me support from people who were unaware of my miscarriage and that my baby I currently have is my rainbow baby. It also had others who I was unaware was suffering a loss come out and share their stories with me. This event over all was amazing and a blessing to be apart of. Jennifer is very talented and was able to make memories none of us will forget.
Amanda Kuntz:
The Rainbow Baby Maternity Event that Jennifer so lovingly put together was such an amazing experience. Meeting other women who have also experienced a loss, that were so open and willing to talk about their experience was beautiful. Miscarriage, infertility, and infant loss is rarely openly talked about, so seeing the outpouring of love and support from all of my family, friends, and even strangers was heart warming. I’m so happy that Jennifer choose me to share my story and be a part of something that will hopefully raise awareness, but most of all help another woman who is silently struggling with her own loss.
Leslie Savko:
What a great way to showcase and bring light to something that no one talks about! I honestly myself didn’t know what a rainbow baby was till about a year ago. I loved how Jennifer brought all 7 of us women from all different walks of life together and with all different experiences. I absolutely loved getting pampered for a day and getting my pictures taken. The whole experience is something I will never forget! So grateful there are people out there wanting to give their own personal time to tell our story for others to hear.
While at the shoot it was more like a celebration than anything! When each blog came out about each girl I bawled my eyes out. Not every woman has a happy ending unfortunately. By the grace of God I feel like I do and am so appreciative of it. I hope the blogs that Jennifer had put together with the photos has helped someone get through or at least talk to someone about their loss.
When Jennifer posted my blog on social media I had such an outpouring of support and others telling me their stories. All around an amazing experience and feel so blessed to be apart of it.
Rainbow Baby mother posed in a white studio wearing a rainbow colored tulle dress. Sheena Boggs:
I truly hope the concept of Rainbow Baby Maternity Events catches on and spreads like wildfire! It was a tremendously thoughtful thing for Jennifer to organize and orchestrate an event to bring awareness in such a bright and happy way to such a dark place. As anyone who has experienced any kind of loss knows, the aftermath is completely uncharted territory…being pregnant after a loss is extremely difficult to navigate. Inside, somewhere deep down, I wanted to celebrate this baby but the fear of the unknown and the million “what if’s” were weighing so heavily on me. By participating in this event I was given a chance to not only celebrate hope but also encourage and support others. It was like a broadcast saying even though bad things happen and we never really know why..there can also be good blessings.
I feel like each woman was truly heard. The pictures were beautiful and the accompanying story was an extremely personal ‘behind the scenes’ look at the heartache that lead to that moment in time. So precious! All of our stories were different, and by having a platform to share, our community was made so much more aware of the helpful things to say or do to support women after a loss. I’m sure some people were also made painfully aware of the things they may have said or done that were hurtful, but hopefully this gives everyone an opportunity to grow and to better understand, love, and support bereaved mothers!
Sheena Ford:
The Rainbow Baby Maternity Event that Jennifer did for us was such an amazing experience. Everything was provided for us from light breakfast, snacks, to our hair and make up, to our outfits to awesome gift bags filled with goodies. I felt like a model, which being pregnant and the biggest I have ever been in my life is a lot to say.
Being in the room with the other girls and knowing that we had all been through the same thing, you could feel the pain that we all had from our experiences being lifted just from being surrounded by people who had experienced the same thing. That for me personally was the first time in my “rainbow” pregnancy that I felt fully understood, which was insane to me because I had never met these women, but I felt so supported and understood by them. Words honestly can not explain this feeling. I would have never shared my miscarriage story with the world if it wasn’t for Jennifer putting on this event for us. When my story posted to the world I was terrified. This was something so personal and tragic for me and it was out there for the whole world to see, but the comments from family and friends were beyond what I could have imagined. So many people opened up and said that they had experienced loss or that my story helped them understand how someone they knew who had experienced loss felt and what they were going through.
I will never be able to thank Jennifer enough for this experience!
Nikki Falvey:
The Rainbow Baby Maternity Event was an extremely special experience for me. It was so encouraging to meet all of the other mamas who have been through infant loss and yet were baring signs of hope in their full bellies and smiling faces. We fell into easy camaraderie right away and bonded quickly over our shared experiences. I am somewhat of a tom girl and hadn’t had my make up or hair professionally styled since high school prom, but I felt like a princess getting made up and pampered by the lovely ladies at the event. Topped off with the lovely, feminine dresses Jennifer made each of us, I felt royally arrayed, like a lily of the field.
Jennifer’s friendly demeanor put at ease my self-consciousness in front of the camera. Even though she had so many mama models to shoot, she still made me feel personally seen and significant. Her sharing of our stories on her blog has also been a healing process for me; to know that my family’s first-conceived child is being remembered and celebrated even in the face of our loss is a huge blessing. I have loved reading each of the Rainbow Mommy’s stories and was so encouraged by the outpouring of support I received after people read mine. This event and the resulting pictures and blog posts have played significant roles in my healing process. I am so grateful to have been included!
Final Thoughts:
One of the most important things I have learned through this whole process is that these babies are forever in their mother’s thoughts and no amount of time or other joys in life will ever take away the longing for their child to be with them. They leave a whole in the hearts of the parents they left behind that can ever be filled. It’s really difficult for someone that has never experienced this tragedy themselves to fully understand what these woman have gone through, and continue to go through on a daily basis, but I hope you can take away some knowledge about how to address the subject in the future after reading each of their stories. Women that have lost a baby don’t need to be handled with kid gloves or avoided because you don’t know what to say. Just talk to them and really listen. They want to talk about their child and tell you about how wonderful their love for them is, just as you would want to about your own children.
I want to personally thank each of these courageous women once more for being brave enough to share their stories. I know the pain is there and never goes away, but through your willingness to open up your hearts and souls to your community, you have forever changed me in the process. I have a newfound respect and admiration for this silent community and hope that we will desensitize the subject so that more mothers out there can start to heal. You ladies will be on my heart for decades to come and have enjoyed watching each of you give birth to your new bundles of joy over the last few months. 5 of the 7 have reached their due dates and had successful deliveries with healthy babies. We are just praying that the remaining 2 women have just as successful births. I’m definitely watching and praying everyday.
More about the photographer:
Jennifer Rittenberry Photography is an award winning photographer based out of Mount Washington Kentucky. She has been photographing clients throughout the greater Louisville area since 2010 and recently acquired a brick and mortar studio space in the heart of downtown Mount Washington. Jennifer is passionate about her work and strives to achieve the highest level of excellence in her work, which has earned her a Click PRO status with Clickin Moms Magazine and elite membership with NAPCP. She is also a published artist in Beauty & Lifestyle Mommy Magazine and Newborn Photographer Magazine, as well as named 2016 Parent’s Choice Award winner for her fine art portraiture. In 2013, she focused her client base to Newborn and Maternity as she created a niche for herself after mentoring with three of the nation’s leading photographers in these industries. She has spent countless hours on continuing her education and sharpening her skills each year with the sole purpose of creating beautiful artwork for her clients to share with their families and preserve as precious heirlooms for generations to come. Located in Central Kentucky, her new studio is only 6 minutes from the Gene Snyder Freeway off the Bardstown exit, and only 6 minutes outside of Louisville. Jennifer Rittenberry Photography session fees can be found on the website but detailed pricing and availability may be requested by email using the contact form.
You are welcome to connect with Jennifer Rittenberry Photography by following my work on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. SIGN UP FOR OUR NEWSLETTER so you can be the first to know about any upcoming portrait specials, mini session events, and other news!
We have MOVED! As of May 1, 2017 we are now located at 1200 North Bardstown Road – Suite 1-A, Mount Washington, KY 40047. Get in touch at (502) 523-2180!
Nikki is the seventh and final mommy in our series of Rainbow Baby Maternity Photography Sessions. We’ll be sharing her heartbreaking history with infant loss and how she became a rainbow mommy. If you missed the first post with all of the Rainbow Mommies, you can catch it here.
Our Rainbow Baby is due June 24th. We are having a little girl, whom we have named Evelyn Maeve, “Evelyn” after her paternal great-great-grandmother and “Maeve” after the legendary Irish queen. We feel these names together embody strength and grace, two characteristics we wish for our little one.
My husband and I had been married for three and a half years, and had been trying for a baby for just as long, when we found out we were pregnant for the first time in December 2015. We had recently moved into our first home together, sans housemates, and were overjoyed to finally have the opportunity to establish our family and home. After so many disappointments, we were floored by the positive pregnancy result and immediately ran to the drug store for another test, just to be sure! As an archaeologist with a physically demanding job and as someone who deals with epilepsy, I was extra cautious and made sure to follow all of the pregnancy rules to a T. But, as we know, sometimes loss occurs despite our best efforts to mitigate it.
I had a minor epileptic seizure in mid February 2016, almost 12 weeks into our pregnancy. When we went to the doctor’s the next day to check up on Baby, she was unable to find a heart beat. An ultrasound revealed that our Baby had not grown since week 6 and was unresponsive. I had what is called a missed, or silent, miscarriage. I have never known such grief as I experienced in the next two weeks, dealing with the emotional, physical, and spiritual loss of our child. I know that we will see this Little One again one day and my only solace at this time was “Christ in [me], the hope of glory” (Colossians 1:27) and my faith that “all things work together for good to them that love God” (Romans 8:28). I did not know why this calamity happened, but I trusted that I would survive it and I did not lose hope for the future.
Fast forward one year, and I am now 26 weeks pregnant with our Rainbow Baby, Evelyn Maeve Falvey! She has passed every medical test with flying colors and I am completely enamored with her every kick and wiggle! The year between losing our first Little One and conceiving Evie brought about some hard conversations and some radical moves to better prepare ourselves for parenthood. One month before we found out we were pregnant, we decided to move from our home in San Diego, California to Gallatin, Tennessee for a better quality of life and to allow me the privilege of being able to stay home and raise children when they came along. Though we didn’t yet know we were pregnant, we stepped out in faith trusting that if we re-prioritized our lives to raise children the way we feel called to, we would be blessed for our sacrifice. We have now been in Tennessee for about a month and are eagerly awaiting the arrival of our baby girl in late June!
I had been open about my first pregnancy with family and friends–and Facebook–from almost the day we found out. I was too excited to keep quiet! Of course, that meant when we experienced the miscarriage, I had to be equally open with our loss. After sharing in a Facebook post, I was amazed and humbled by the outpouring of sympathy, love, and similar stories that flooded in from all different people in my life. So many women had had the same experience, but were not comfortable sharing about it with others, so were forced to suffer silently, adding a feeling of alienation to their grief. Since this experience, I have felt that it is important for women to know that there is no shame in a miscarriage. The feelings of guilt can be overwhelming, which is why it is so important to have a support system to lean on. The Rainbow Babies Maternity Event attracted me because it is a celebration of honesty and new hope, proof that the loss of a child, while always with us, can find redemption in the creation of a new life.
I think most people do not know how to react or what to say when confronted with miscarriage. It is so little talked about that few people know how common it actually is. It is difficult for many to fathom that the loss is as tangible for the parents as the loss of a birthed child.
The loss of our first child to miscarriage is the most grievous experience I have gone through. It matured me and deepened my faith more quickly than any other experience. I knew that I had a choice to be angry with God and slip into depression, or to trust His plans and try to learn from the pain. I lean on Him daily by reading the Bible, prayer, and journaling. It has made me more sympathetic to others who have dealt with miscarriage or with fertility problems. It also, in moments of weakness, made me more fearful in my current pregnancy; I spent the first trimester with pent breath, feeling at times that a second loss was inevitable. The pain never goes away, but it has gotten easier to manage with time and I am comforted to know that our Rainbow daughter has a big brother or sister with whom she will spend eternity.
Most people are sympathetically at a loss of words when they learn of my miscarriage. Some don’t seem to understand why it is such a big deal, and try to comfort me with the idea of future children. While well-intentioned, this misses the point of my grief: I am not grieving children in the general but MY specific lost child. Others take empathy a bit too far and treat me like a China doll, constantly asking how I am doing and telling me they know I will have children in the future. Again, they mean well, but the constant reminder of my greatest loss is not always welcome.
Some women share similar stories, which can be comforting, but can also be disheartening. A number of women told me about having 5 or so miscarriages and these stories always rekindle fear that I will never have a successful pregnancy. Stories of Rainbow Parents help curb that fear with hope.
In the future, I would like for people to respond with the understanding that this loss was the loss of a beloved child, not some sort of sickness effecting my body only. People react to the loss of a loved one differently, and sometimes I don’t want to talk about it as the pain is still to raw, but personally, I appreciate the chance to share my story with sympathetic listeners. Sharing allows me to memorialize our Little One and allows his/her short life to impact the lives of others.
If I could give any advice to a momma that is going through what I’ve went through, I’d have to say first of all, I am so so sorry for your loss. The pain you are going through is legitimate and it will take time to become fully functional in your daily life again. Know that what you are going through is not your fault. Don’t torture yourself trying to find where you went wrong or wondering if you are unfit to parent. There is a lesson to be learned through this grief, but it is not in beating yourself or your partner up. Be honest about your feelings with those around you and take the time you need to grieve. Reach out to friends and family when you need to; a solid support group is so important right now. Though it doesn’t go away completely, the pain will lessen with time. Try to focus on activities that minister to you and get you outside of yourself for a little while. For me, these are hiking and being in nature, for others it might be exercise or art or any number of things. These are healthy ways of coping with loss so that your Little One is not forgotten, but you are also not consumed by grief. Remember that your identity is still intact; you still have friends, family members, a job, hobbies, likes, and dislikes that define you. You are still a mother, but you are not only a mother. Finally, if you know Christ, run to Him for comfort right now; ask and it will be given to you (Matt. 7:7-11). If you do not, I encourage you to open a Bible (the book of Psalms or the Gospel of John are good starting points) and read with an open heart; the emptiness you are feeling can only be filled by your and your lost Little One’s Heavenly Father.
I personally want to thank Nikki and her willingness to open her heart and share it so freely with me, and now every single one of you. Our hope in sharing her story is to raise awareness about infant loss, miscarriage and still birth. Throughout this series you will read other heartbreaking stories as this, but the focus is on the strength these women have, their beauty and hopefulness for a bright future with their rainbow babies. I pray that each of these pregnancies results in happy and healthy babies!
Photographer Challenge!
I would love nothing more than for this concept to catch on in other cities and states with photographers to bless rainbow mommas! Not only does it create a sense of community, but it gives back with you sharing your talents with your fellow community members. So, if you take me up on my challenge, please hashtag #RainbowBabyMaternityEvent so I can follow your adventures, too!
If you’re looking for a Crestwood KY Rainbow Baby Maternity Photographer, please get in touch via the contact form or send an email to Hello@jlritt.com. You can also book online here.
More about the photographer:
Jennifer Rittenberry Photography is an award winning photographer based out of Mount Washington Kentucky. She has been photographing clients throughout the greater Louisville area since 2010 and recently acquired a brick and mortar studio space in the heart of downtown Mount Washington. Jennifer is passionate about her work and strives to achieve the highest level of excellence in her work, which has earned her a Click PRO status with Clickin Moms Magazine and elite membership with NAPCP. She is also a published artist in Beauty & Lifestyle Mommy Magazine and Newborn Photographer Magazine, as well as named 2016 Parent’s Choice Award winner for her fine art portraiture. In 2013, she focused her client base to Newborn and Maternity as she created a niche for herself after mentoring with three of the nation’s leading photographers in these industries. She has spent countless hours on continuing her education and sharpening her skills each year with the sole purpose of creating beautiful artwork for her clients to share with their families and preserve as precious heirlooms for generations to come. Located in Central Kentucky, her new studio is only 6 minutes from the Gene Snyder Freeway off the Bardstown exit, and only 3 minutes outside of Louisville. Jennifer Rittenberry Photography session fees can be found on the website but detailed pricing and availability may be requested by email using the contact form.
You are welcome to connect with Jennifer Rittenberry Photography by following my work on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. SIGN UP FOR OUR NEWSLETTER so you can be the first to know about any upcoming portrait specials, mini session events, and other news!
We have MOVED! New studio opens on May 1, 2017 and will be located at 1200 North Bardstown Road – Suite E, Mount Washington, KY 40047. Get in touch at (502) 523-2180!
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